The Scaredy Kid wants to Giddy Up N Go

My last update included video of my son riding a horse. My daughter went to this horseback riding birthday party too, but she didn't ride. She wouldn't ride and had made her mind up about it long before we got there. No way, no how. She wasn't going to do it. She's afraid.

The horse is too big, she said.

She did groom the horse and give it a few pats, which is more than I anticipated. Way more, and I was thrilled she at least did that.



















Yet, I find myself disappointed. Why won't my kid ride the horse like all the other kids did? Why won't my kid go on the merry-go-round or all the rides at the boardwalk like her friends. She doesn't like the swings at the play-ground.

Because she is afraid.

I wish I could get to the bottom of it and know why she is so afraid, or wave a magic wand and make the fear go away. I think about my baby being afraid and I want to help. And then the "mother of a child with autism" hat kicks in and I start to wonder about little sister. Is this related? Is this sensory? Is she on the spectrum too? Or, am I being paranoid. Is this a phase and "this too shall pass"? And why does this bother me so much? Why can't I just be happy that she is 'her own person' and accept that she has fears and her own likes and dislikes. How horrible am I for putting these unrealistic expectations on her and wanting her to be 'without flaws' when she is absolutely just perfect the way she is.

So, the little girl who wouldn't ride the horse - Who is afraid of horses.... Guess what she is asking for for Christmas (10,000 times a day when she sees the commercial during Dora)? Yep, Giddyup N' Go Pony from Little Tikes. It is a toy horse that kids actually ride on. We do not have the space for this, and it is pretty expensive. However, I am tempted to give in on it. Because she wants to ride. My kid, the same one who is afraid of everything - wants to ride. The thought of her riding on a horse, fake or not, makes me all giddy inside and wipes those feelings of inadequacy away. My step mother in law asked me last year and again last week about getting her one of the FurReal Friends Ponies that are interactive (you feed and brush them). Last year, I said no to them buying this extravagant gift. This year, I'm thinking a resounding yes, and maybe the better question is "which one to get".

One thing is for certain, we need a bigger house!